Just started my full time job this week, after doing part time for 3 quarters of 2010.
Mo, not as a photographer, but a standard 9am-6pm office guy.
Currently still adjusting/transition phase for bodyclock/sleeping hours for work, pretty much alright now, just that I feel quite tired after work due to sudden change of sleeping hours.

Anyways, not much shoots, have not really started asking for collaboration yet, other than one cos-shoot this coming Saturday.
Hoping to quickly settle with work and bodyclock, so I can start planning/schedule shoots.

Most people thought that many cosers/models asked me to help them shoot, but on the contrary, it rarely happens.
80% of the time I will be the one who initiates for a collaboration, and several times I do get rejected/show on interest (directly or indirectly).
I'm not ashamed to admit this, everyone has their unique taste and it's fine that they don't find me work interesting and/or good.
I take this as a stronger motivation to improve and try more stuffs, and be a better photographer as an overall package.

But what makes me kind of annoyed is, the thought that cosers/models flock to me for shoots, which is totally untrue.
What people didn't know that, I do make a certain amount of effort to even have a shoot planned.
Contacting, communication, inquiry on interest for collaboration, discussions, planning, watching/reading the series (if it's a cosplay shoot) to understand more, and the shoot itself.
At times, it's planned even months ahead before the real shoot, especially if it's an overseas shoot.

I said this many times, I don't have talent, that's why I try to input many more hours of practice/research to compensate it (lack of talent).
To a small extent as said to me, I lack of luck, though this is totally unscientific and creating excuses for myself.
But sometimes I feel I'm not at the right place at the right time, sort of one step too early, or one step too late.

What will be right and never betray you in my opinion are, hardwork, determination, and personal will to be better.

There's a few shoots that I really want to try like:

- Cheongsam shoot inspired from "In The Mood Of Love", friend showed me an place in Shanghai fits what I want, and I have someone in mind over there who would fit the model I visualise for this.
- Shiina Ringo/Tokyo Jihen
- Chinese novel series cosplay, shooting in desert or snowscapes
- Underwater shoot
- Night fashion/concept shoot with the use of rain, cars, and strobes.
- and need to start a series of something...can't find a term to describe it.

Wish to shoot at least once a week on average, hoping to break 100 shoots this year, but at the current pace I doubt so.
(Last year I have 83 shoots, not inclusive of concert or paid assignments.)
Well, I know people will say quality over quantity, but I have said above, I have no talent.
I need to work and practice much more and harder than others, and this sort of give myself the amount of stress to improve, to breakthrough.
I can go to the extent to comprimise on sleep and health for photography, this is my determination.
Feel free to call me crazy, but I rather live a happy life acheiving what you want but a shorter lifespan (touch wood!), than to live a ripe old age but achieve nothing or things that you will be proud off in your life.

Time to sleep after writing this is half-awake state (sprouting rubbish/rants), got to wake up for work in less than 5 hours.